good days are back
...ght in front of our guest. - > > Kate Newman, 46, Winston-Salem, NC > > > > > > 3. HO, HO, HO............. I was taking a shower when > > my 2 year old son came into the bathroom and wrapped > > himself in toilet paper. Although he made a mess, he > > looked adorable, so I ran for my camera and took a > > few shots. They came out so well that I had copies > > made and included one with each of our Christmas > > cards. Days later, a relative called about the > > picture, laughing hysterically, and suggesting I take > > a closer look. Puzzled, I stared at the photo and was > > shocked to discover that in addition to my son, I had > > captured my reflection in the mirror wearing nothing > > but a camera! - Name Withheld > > > > 4. LADY GOLFER................ I was at the golf store > > comparing different kinds of golf balls. I was > > unhappy with the women's type I had been using. After > > browsing for several minutes, I was approached by one > > of the good looking gentlemen who works at the store. > > He asked if he could help me. Without thinking, I > > looked at him and said, "I think I like playing with > > men's balls."- Colleen Collins, 31, Ferndale, MI > > > > 5. NUTS ABOUT YOU............My sister and I were at > > the mall and passed by a store that sold a variety of > > nuts. As we were looking at the display case, the boy > > behind the counter asked if we needed any help. I > > replied, "No, I'm just looking at your nuts." My > > sister started to laugh hysterically, the boy grinned, > > and I turned beet red and walked away. To this day, my > > sister has never let me forget. - Faye Emerick, 34, > > Ellerslie, MD > > > > 6. PRICELESS.............A lady picked up several > > items at a discount store. When she finally got up to > > the checker, she learned that one of her items had no > > price tag. Imagine her embarrassment when the checker > > got on the intercom and boomed out for all the store > > to hear,"PRICE CHECK ON LANE THIRTEEN, TAMPAX, SUPER > > SIZE." That was bad enough, but somebody at the rear > > of the store apparently misunderstood the word > > "Tampax" for "THUMBTACKS." In a business-like tone, a > > voice boomed back over the intercom. "DO YOU WANT THE > > KIND YOU PUSH IN WITH YOUR THUMB OR THE KIND YOU POUND > > IN WITH A HAMMER?" > > > > 7. MOM'S ADVICE......... A teacher noticed that a > > little boy at the back of the class was squirming > > around, scratching his crotch and not paying > > attention. She went back to find out what was going > > on. He was quite embarrassed and whispered that he > > had just recently been circumcised and he was quite > > itchy. The teacher told him to go down to the > > principal's office. He was to phone his mother and ask > > her what he should do about it. He did it and > > returned to his class. Suddenly, there was a commotion > > at the back of the room. She went back to investigate > > only to find him sitting at his desk with his penis > > hanging out. "I thought I told you to call your Mom." > > she screamed. "I did," he said, "And she told me that > > if ...